Gender is an essential part of a person's cultural identity. Gender plays a role in determining what jobs society deems appropriate for each sex, how they should dress, and how they should conduct themselves (Barnes). All of the different things that gender dictates also affects a person's cultural identity. If a person does not have a stereotypical job for their sex, they may be seen as abnormal.
An example of this could be a woman who holds a job in construction work. Society may not view her as "feminine" enough as a result of this occupation. In terms of language, that construction worker would be more likely to have a similar diction to her co-workers in construction, many of whom would be male. The female construction worker might be more likely to curse or use language not viewed as generally inappropriate for her sex. This could be a result of the woman picking up on her co-workers speech patterns in order to better integrate into their social dynamic, or she could have already had these speech patterns before getting this job (thus making her transition into their social dynamic easier).
The language that is used by different genders has an effect on a person's cultural identity—in that gendered-language is indicative of larger social expectations of the gender binary. Men's learned speech patterns are tied into constructed perceptions of masculinity (dominating and decisive); even tone and pitch in language can determine how a man is viewed/compared to other men.
Conversely, women are taught to conduct themselves as passive and self-sacrificing; this can manifest itself in many ways in language (Barnes and Eicher). Women are more like to apologize (or to use apologetic inflections) because they have been conditioned to constantly acclimate themselves to the needs of others (Manning-Schaffel).
In the end, if someone does not conform to language patterns that they have been conditioned to associate with a certain gender, they are likewise defined, within this schema, as "abnormal" within their gender presentation.
Works Cited
Barnes, Ruth, and Joanne Bubolz Eicher. Dress and Gender: Making Meaning in Cultural Contexts. Berg, 1992.
Manning-Schaffel, Vivian. "Stop Saying 'I'm Sorry' When You Don't Mean It — Say This Instead." NBC News, 2019.
https://www.nbcnews.com/better/pop-culture/how-stop-saying-i-m-sorry-all-time-what-say-ncna917011
To address the first part of your question, regarding "words or phrases that reflect the different gender norms and/or statuses of men and women," one can reflect on titles common in our culture and what they denote and connote. The title "Miss" is used to address a woman who is not married, regardless of her age. The title "Mrs." is used to address a woman of any age who is married. And if a woman has chosen the title "Ms." it might be because she does not wish to be identified by her marital status. If a person wishes to address a woman without a name at all, "miss" is typically used for a younger woman, while "ma'am" is used for one who is not young. In this way, women are marked by their marital status and age.
Men, on the other hand, are simply addressed as "Mr." or "sir" Their marital status and age are not marked by these all-purpose addresses. A possible takeaway from these observations is that women are sorted according to their availability, or perhaps desirability, in the English language, whereas men are not sorted at all.
In our society, men and women often speak differently. According to Xia (2013), women are far more likely to use certain color words, like "mauve," "lavender" and "magenta," words which men rarely use. Moreover, when it comes to adjectives, there are clear distinctions in the words which men and women use. Women, for example, are more likely to say words like "adorable," "charming" and "gorgeous," whereas a man is more likely to simply use the term "good." There are also clear differences in the use of curse words among men and women. Chiefly, men are far more likely to curse than women. (See the first reference link for more information.)
For some sociologists, like Deborah Tannen, these differences in speech should not come as a surprise since men and women play very different roles in our society and have very different expectations to fulfill. Gendered speech is, therefore, instrumental in maintaining our cultural ideas about men and women. By using these color words and adjectives, for example, women maintain the idea that they are more sensitive and emotional, while men preserve the idea that they are more rational.
For other sociologists, however, these differences in speech are a byproduct of the differing power relations between men and women. Gendered speech is, therefore, about maintaining male power. By being more polite, for instance, and cursing less, women reflect their secondary status in our society.
See the second reference link for more information on these opposing ideas.
http://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/myl/ldc/ling001/gender.htm
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